Feeling stressed during wedding planning? I’ve provided some advice on that before, but here are some additional tips to make you feel like your head is above water again!
Don’t be afraid to offend people
Just say what you mean. Say what you want. Don’t apologize for what you want, and don’t feel like you owe folks some long winded discussion of why you want (or don’t want) X, Y, or Z at your wedding.
Along those same lines, quit writing such long winded e-mails or leaving uber explanatory voicemails.
Let’s illustrate with an example. Here’s how to send an e-mail to your florist:
Can I add peonies to my bouquet?
Here’s how NOT to send an e-mail to your florist:
I was thinking about it the other day, and I’m wondering if I can add peonies to my bouquet. I realize that it might not be season for them or that they might be hard for you to get, but can you let me know if that would be possible? I saw picture of one in a magazine and just loved it! I realize that we talked about this briefly during the consultation and everything, but what can I say, I just can’t make up my mind!”
You’re busy and your wedding vendors are busy. Save yourself time by writing quick and succinct e-mails, and save them time so they don’t have to search through paragraphs to text to find the point of your e-mail.
Follow up on your e-mails as soon as you get them.
Don’t let them languish in your inbox. If you aren’t ready to make a decision that is related to that e-mail, just reply back, “Hi, thanks for your e-mail. I haven’t made a decision about this yet, but expect to do so in the next two weeks.” If you’ve ever read David Allen’s Getting Things Done, you know how important it is to clear your mental clutter. And all those unanswered e-mails and voicemails are mental clutter. And when the person calls you or e-mails you again in a week to follow up on their now un-replied to e-mail, that will add even more to your mental clutter and stress.
I know, this is easier said than done. Here are some tips. But don’t purchase anything for the wedding unless you already have a place for it at home. Make sure you’re tracking your next steps (my new obsession is OmniFocus on my iPad, which is great for keeping track of next tasks, but I still use Google Docs extensively), and what things you’re waiting on other folks for as well (has your bridesmaid given you her measurements yet? Has your caterer made that change to the contract that you requested? It doesn’t matter what system you use, but keep track!