There’s a common theme that I have experienced while planning a wedding. Each vendor thinks that his or her services are absolutely essential to having a successful wedding.
Well, here’s what I have to say. No vendors’ services are essential to the success of your wedding. They will, however, try to convince you that their services are in fact, essential.
They will play on your emotions and your stress. They’ll say, “oh, that’s the LAST thing you want to worry about on your wedding day!” or, “Couples always regret that they didn’t work that into their budget!”
They may even try to convince you that your guests won’t have a good time if you don’t have a certain element, like a cocktail hour or a deejay. Or that your guests will think that you’re inconsiderate if you don’t offer transportation between your ceremony, reception, and hotel.
Whether it be self-deejaying, DIY makeup, videography, buying a wedding dress from China instead of a local boutique, wedding-day transportation, or day-of coordinating, they will convince you that their service is essential.
They are, of course, business people and sales people. They have a vested interest in getting your business and they use sales tactics that work. I do not fault them for that. But, this blog is about advice for brides, not vendors. So, this is a very important thing to remember when you are considering DIYing certain things. Listen to what the vendors have to say, but be very objective about your decision. Don’t allow them to play on your emotions and stress. They’re trying to close the sale.
Seek out honest, independent advice from brides who have been there, done that on things that you may be considering DIYing or eliminating altogether. There are so many places online that will help guide you and help you in your efforts. So, if you want to do it yourself, then do it. Do your homework, do your research, and yes, it is harder than just signing a check over to some vendor, but be confident in your decision. Plenty of other brides have had successful weddings with no deejay, no caterer, no flowers, and no makeup artist.
Once you do book a vendor, of course it is important to have a certain level of trust. But always remember to question anything you think sounds out of the ordinary!
Thank you for linking my blog! I hope it helped you feel better about going against the norm, even if you did hire a DJ.
I’m thankful that the vendors I did have, were actually my friends. One from college and one from my old job. They never made me feel like my wedding would DIE without their services. Even our caterer was incredibly flexible and honest.
But I think there is a lot of fear mongering out there from a lot of vendors. I think there can be a balance between listing the positives of a service versus making you feel guilty about not having those services. And at the same time we all understand that they have bills to pay and this is how they’re making their living, but the approach is always what bothered me, especially from DJs.
I love the blunt honesty of this post. I’m sure it’s not what vendors will want to read, but it’s the damn truth.
Oops, I’m an ass. I forgot you WERE doing an ipod wedding. Forgive me, I spent like 10 hours at a fundraiser yesterday and my brain still isn’t awake even though it’s almost 1pm.
Ha! No worries! I kept changing my mind about the whole deejay thing a few months ago!